There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
