He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
