He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
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I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
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We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.