At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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