i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
