This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
