The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
