The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
After tacos, we're chasing women.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize