dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
