also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
