is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I need water and some morals
Randomize
