i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
You can't just leave with hair like that
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
