we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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