My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize