ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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