He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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