Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize