dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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