it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
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