My cat gives me a boner
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize