There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm đđ»đ
We are so blessed
Just because you havenât had your UTI yet doesnât mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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