Texts From Last Night

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  (303): View more from Colorado

  We took shots in honor of Shark Week.

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  (303): We took shots in honor of Shark Week. http://tfl.nu/tloc
  Replies (19) Good night (7657) Bad night (614)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me

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  (318): I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me http://tfl.nu/y794
  Replies (39) Good night (822) Bad night (4547)
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.

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  (985): I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies. http://tfl.nu/mtcu
  Replies (50) Good night (6722) Bad night (855)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality

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  (256): A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality http://tfl.nu/65cw
  Replies (44) Good night (7553) Bad night (973)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  dibs on John Mayer's hood pass

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  (267): dibs on John Mayer's hood pass http://tfl.nu/rqbz
  Replies (35) Good night (2660) Bad night (877)
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  (310): View more from California

  He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.

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  (310): He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls. http://tfl.nu/jh5k
  Replies (17) Good night (762) Bad night (3608)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.

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  (937): I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens. http://tfl.nu/zmnj
  Replies (18) Good night (6707) Bad night (1183)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.

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  (330): I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come. http://tfl.nu/lijh
  Replies (4) Good night (1720) Bad night (617)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game

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  (651): Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game http://tfl.nu/de08
  Replies (13) Good night (1633) Bad night (633)
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  (716): View more from New York

  As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."

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  (716): As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is." http://tfl.nu/8j8j
  Replies (34) Good night (5871) Bad night (1342)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon

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  (480): Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon http://tfl.nu/8tqm
  Replies (3) Good night (705) Bad night (606)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them

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  (304): The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them http://tfl.nu/pyf8
  Replies (10) Good night (515) Bad night (1091)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN

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  (574): LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN http://tfl.nu/j386
  Replies (1) Good night (521) Bad night (229)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.

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  (306): For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now. http://tfl.nu/yu2a
  Replies (4) Good night (304) Bad night (659)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.

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  (610): All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship. http://tfl.nu/y1t2
  Replies (2) Good night (477) Bad night (233)

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