Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
