He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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