I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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