The maid of honor just puked.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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