theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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