pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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