The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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