What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
he shaved USA in his pubs
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
