First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
