I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
