Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Randomize
