everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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