just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize