Got a toothbrush?
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Randomize