Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'm sobbing to NWA
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
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