and you said cock pushups were impossible
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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