Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Randomize
