You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize