He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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