uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
the day after is always just damage control
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
