think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
