a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
