her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize
