your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I intend to get homeless drunk
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Randomize
