He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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