I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize