Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
