Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
No subtext here. People are naked.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize