White coat. Heels.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Randomize
